|
Post by believe&become on Dec 12, 2015 9:32:18 GMT -5
J Mzungu thank you for those videos! They were so funny. I like Can't Tell Me Nothing the best - I just adore Zach. I don't always like the movies he's in, but even then, his presence is just so sunny and complete for me *tries to hide crush*.
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 12, 2015 9:14:34 GMT -5
@stevenssimsstuff I am glad that you were able to come home to your family and that they did not have to see it all directly.
Having said that, I am also glad to have seen the other side of "life on Earth" even as a child. The armed conflict did not last much, only about two weeks, but I did see murder, rape, looting, fear, hunger etc without even having the vocabulary to name them - I do have memories but they are made of images, smells, sounds, not like my "grown up memories". Since I didn't really understand what was going on, it did not affect me greatly on a conscious level, but the aftermath was a lot worse for me. My father snapped and became very abusive for some time, my mother got pregnant and lost the baby (not sure if he beat her), and my baby sister (she was not yet a year old) began showing symptoms of being mentally disturbed. I remember thinking at the time, my father is a monster, my mother is going to die, and my sister's soul is dying (there was no light any more in her eyes), I wonder what happens next. That was besides losing the house, all the possessions, and not having food, or only food that made us sick.
But I have no complaints. No pity party for me. I am so so lucky to not only have lived through that, but to grow from it. Thanks to that experience I will never be like everyone else my age, nor do I wish to be; I always think beyond, and always try to understand and support other people that suffer (of course sometimes I make mistakes). Perhaps I can even help other children who go through similar experiences. So for me, even bad things that happened to me, I believe God knew I could make it, and not rot inside. I also believe I chose it, even before being born, because Pain is the best, best teacher to be Awake. By the way, my father died last year, and it was not traumatic - I do miss him very much but we grew very close while he was dying and I actually told him he could go, everything was forgiven, that he was loved, that he was going to be safe (and saved). He did the best he could and he did get better.
I think you are right in many things. War is always bad. But military service - as my father once said, it is the last chance for a lazy young man with no self discipline to become "someone". Of course, I prefer it were not necessary to go to that extreme, but as long as one's physical and mental health is not permanently damaged, it is still so much better than to lose oneself in hedonism. I also think you did the right thing when you joined, and when you left. Bravo.
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 21:38:51 GMT -5
Thank you @countrykris, they were actually both nice and crazy at the same time.
@stevenssimsstuff I also want to thank you for answering me in so much detail about your war experiences in the Introduction Thread. I didn't answer you there as I didn't want to scare off newbies with such heavy stuff, but it was very interesting for me. My personal war experience is only witnessing military coup d'etat in West Africa and having military people around me very often. But I am also the closest to my father and collected his wartime stories, pictures, experiences; for him it was fun and romantic in some ways (like saving good people from "bad people", fighting for the fatherland, honour and glory) but perhaps similar to you, it was totally different when he had a family to protect. In that sense, he enjoyed some of his experience as a wild bachelor fighting in Vietnam (and other areas), but he crashed emotionally when we went through the military coup and he had a wife and two little girls beside him.
In line with that experience, I'm sharing one of my favourite songs. It still can make me cry with happiness, and I'm not sure why. It also has beauty and craziness and violence.
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 21:14:54 GMT -5
I did get a lot of interest in this project but no specific requests, so I did what I wanted what my kids wanted, and just added some old skool stuff for myself, ‘cause, ya know, I am an old lady. No mesh necessary (base game), disabled for random. Artwork credits:
1) Jeru the Damaya by Jonathan Fustin 2) Tupac Shakur by Jonathan Fustin 3) Lauryn Hill - cover art of Lauryn does gospel 4) Alicia Keys by Katie Rodgers 5) Sade by Sara Golish 6) Snoop by Borbay 7) Queen Latifah - cover art of Nature of a Sista 8) Kid Cudi - cover art of Man on the Moon: The Legend of Mr. Rager 9) Grandmaster Flash - from DJ Hero 10) Will Smith by Joe DiChiara 11) Grandmaster Flash - from DJ Hero 12) Timbaland by Dan Evans #urban #clothes #hoodies #kids #children #tops #cas #hiphop #rap #theafricansim #believe&become #alicia keys #snoop #grandmaster flash #will smith #sweatshirt #sports #sportswear #casual
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 20:48:46 GMT -5
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 20:44:30 GMT -5
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 20:09:29 GMT -5
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 19:51:11 GMT -5
caseymarie welcome to the wonderful world of custom content! Besides reading the tutorials (I love Orangemitten's and Brujah's tutorials in particular, and it helped me create my first cc) I have a few tips from my experience so far: - think about making what you want/need in game; that helps you get motivated and keeps you interested - if you can, start off with something simple. I recommend a recolour of a painting or a carpet or t-shirt. I don't recommend making hair or sculpting furniture as your first cc if you have no experience with meshing programs (e.g. Blender, Milkshape, Maya, etc). This is just a personal opinion of course, but since creating objects and hair involves both texture and mesh, it makes sense to start off with mastering at least one of those rather than both. However, a good compromise if you're bent on meshing is modifying an existing mesh (rather than creating one from absolute scratch). I don't know a lot about meshing so please don't consider me this an expert opinion! - remember that if you use someone else's mesh or texture, you need to check their terms of use (TOU) and/or contact them for permission. Don't waste hours on something you planned to share and find out later you can't. Using EA meshes are fine. - if you convert cc from another Sims game, you also need permission from the original creator (at least if it's not EA) - find the resources you need; e.g. similar meshes or the textures you want, inspirational photos of what you want to make - put everything you need, e.g. resources or notes in the same place, e.g. a specific folder on your desktop or documents folder. Make a folder per project so it doesn't get messy. - don't underestimate the power of a written piece of paper/notebook (digital format,e,g, Evernote might also work for you but I like to be able to see the list outside my screen, and have my screen only for what I'm working on). If you're making several swatches (e.g. several hair colours, or several fabric textures), list what you're creating (e.g. swatch 01: blue polka dot swatch 02: red stripes). It will help you further on especially when making thumbnails or swatch previews. And it's easy to get lost in the process if you don't have the basics somewhere. - ask for help when needed! We're all here to help. - Have LOTS of fun. Don't get frustrated. It's so much fun when you get the hang of it. Happy Simming and happy modding!
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 19:35:06 GMT -5
Thank you orangemittens ! A real quickie question for a busy lady- what's your nearest (non-human) animal right now?
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 19:22:28 GMT -5
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 11, 2015 19:07:43 GMT -5
I'll share a silly story - my little sister at the age of 12 said to me "I really want you to create a tuenti account!" (tuenti is a social media chat thing for teenagers and twenty somethings in Spain). And I said, "What for?" "So we can talk!" "Sara, we live in the same house. If you want to talk, we can... I don't know, talk? Like in the same room?" She was actually in my bedroom as she said this. *smh* It's more fun over a Social Network, for some reason...actually - You know the Reason, "The Invented Persona". It's strange, but it happens to everyone - well, maybe not everyone...to be and say things a bit different due to that internet space dividing you from Reality...ha! There was a girl...or, who knows, could have been a Guy...back in the AOL Chat Days - anyone remember AOL chat?!? Ha! She used to say the most unbelievable things...."DongZilla".....just really - to me, funny statements about, "Dongs". I miss her, she made me Laugh all the time. "Invented Persona". °30's Room...You will be missed, so will being 30-something..... ;°P "The Invented Persona"... I didn't need external invented personae, I was introverted and imaginative enough to make 9 different personalities for my teen self. I actually made a grid that horizontally said "Good/Neutral/Evil" and vertically said "Mind/Heart/Body", which originated 9 possibilites (e.g. Good - body would be a very active, physical, sporty person who built homes for the needy; Evil - mind would plan the destruction of mankind, etc), each had a different name, race, personality, nationality, 4 were male, 4 were female and 1 was hermaphrodite. Come to think of it, sounds like the Sims, without a PC. I didn't confuse them with my real self though, I would just write diatribes between them. I do remember AOL chat. Though I used yahoo chatrooms more often in the 90s, early 2000s. And I had a box of 10 diskettes labelled "Internet". Lmao, what great memories. Steven, maybe you already found that girl/dude with a dong obsession. Or maybe you always knew her/him, s/he went undercover to chat to you. Who else makes you laugh? Oh, and are you a Baby Boomer or Gen X then? One of the nicest thing one of my German (Baby Boomer) cousins said to me once was that I belonged to her generation, despite being in the same age group as her kids (Gen X). I guess that the fact I like being considered older than I am is not a common thing, at least among women. There is a saying in Spanish which is that the old devil is wise because he is old, not because he is a devil. Not that all old people are wise!! I end this personal drama with a popular poem to set off some controversy: Women, they have many faults, And men, only two: Everything they say, and everything they do.
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 10, 2015 11:29:16 GMT -5
Man I'm sorry about all that happening! You haven't had a dull moment! What I really liked about your story was the playing monopoly by torchlight. There must have been some good laughs. It does remind me that sometimes people need powercuts to start talking to each other. I'll share a silly story - my little sister at the age of 12 said to me "I really want you to create a tuenti account!" (tuenti is a social media chat thing for teenagers and twenty somethings in Spain). And I said, "What for?" "So we can talk!" "Sara, we live in the same house. If you want to talk, we can... I don't know, talk? Like in the same room?" She was actually in my bedroom as she said this. *smh* However, hope power is up and running for you today MisterS!! And that you get the mojo back on for creating.
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 10, 2015 11:08:23 GMT -5
It's... complicated. The relationship is truly not usually toxic, and yet somehow it keeps ending up that way... Right now, where I fall is that I know if she reappears, I'll forgive her, but I don't know if she will. A big problem is she vanished and there's no closure (it's seriously complicated, she vanished for good reason), and... I can't look at our relationship and see something bad, because it was mostly wonderful... However, I can't handle this emptiness and I just want to move on, and I'm a little terrified I will and she'll pop back up and shake my whole firetrucking identity loose (because right now who I was is just inextricably tied to her, and I need to be someone new to start over...) I'm already messed up and unstable, and she makes it about a hundred times worse in all the best (and some of the worst) ways... For now, I just want to try to find something else to motivate me, and it's hard... My life, my relationships, my identity, they're all a mess, and I just... I gave up months ago, and the only reason I kept going was in the hopes that something would give me motivation again... I can't be motivated for myself anymore, I don't have it in me, I don't want to try... I don't really much care about how 'healthy' that is, I just want to find something beautiful and amazing and scary and exciting, because without it, I don't want anything... Honestly, even then, the only two reasons I'm trying anymore is because I have people in my life that want me around, and because I tried bailing on life and failed. That's why I'm just frustrated as firetruck, because honestly, I'm not up for life unless there's something to pull me along on an adventure. I don't want to live, I'm resigned to it for now, and I'll try to change that, but I don't actually want to... The world is a shitty place that has a few shining beacons, and right now, I can't see any of them... Everything about me hurts constantly, and all I can do is dull the pain by ignoring the poo around me and losing myself in stuff like this game/community. I truly appreciate you trying to help, but I am big on psychology, and I know you can't help someone that doesn't want to be helped. I'm willing to try to find a reason, but I don't want it anymore. If I understand you right, you want to find Life " outside" yourself (something or someone that stimulates your will to live), and don't want to nurture the Life " inside". It's not possible to heal like that. I'm sorry if that sounds judgmental. I won't say much on that level unless you do change your mind about it and actually want to do the inner work. Since you did mention identity crisis, which I can relate to, from personal and professional experience, please consider the possibility that the small part of you that DOES want to heal, move on, build again, also deserves attention and nurturing and may actually be your "real self" - your own Light that wants to shine. On a more superficial level, I had a similar experience. I fell in love, he disappeared for valid personal reasons, I crashed and didn't want to "get on with things" because I thought it would mean annulling all the wonderful things I was/felt and at the time could not distinguish what I was from what I was when I was with him. After about a year I accepted hopes of getting back were dead and I did move on. (Drum roll) And he came back. I was stronger, more balanced, had "more to give", was less emotionally dependent. A year later, it wasn't working any more but for other reasons, and I have no regrets, I learnt a lot from being with him and being without him, and definitely don't regret healing and rebuilding, nor do I regret trying to make it work. I have no doubt you (the real you) ARE Light, not an empty vessel waiting for "ex or next" or a new life experience or hobby to fill you up. May you find your true self in your own time, and until then, may you find solace in pastimes, good company, and joyful moments. Don't hesitate to seek professional or personal help - you deserve it. You may also PM me if you wish. Happy Simming!
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 9, 2015 18:40:41 GMT -5
Let me guess. A toxic, addictive relationship. That's hard to break, and quite easy to prefer the autodestruct button. That's a psychic hold someone got on you. How do you feel about (white) magic?
|
|
|
Post by believe&become on Dec 9, 2015 12:39:32 GMT -5
Like in traffic, in the game of Life, if everything is going your way, you are most likely going in the wrong direction - lol, and they say we shouldn't take things too seriously, none of us are going to get out of here alive. However, the 3 things we got to make it through: Hope, Faith and Love. It'll get better. Finn Quill I have Faith that you will see a better day. See if you can focus on loving someone peaceful- anyone, not necessarily a partner; a parent, a sibling, a friend, a pet, Nature, someone who isn't here physically. When you're busy actively loving, it's less likely to brain-crash into a pity party. And feel free to elaborate - or not. Not scared of messy over here - nothing beautiful was ever tidy in my world.
|
|